Eating with Sex-Offenders

Okay, so the title is meant to grab at curiosity…but it is relevant.  I do apologize ahead of time for any manipulation that was in my heart.

The season I appear to be in is challenging the issues of my heart.  As I work through the chapters of the book “Living Free” by Mike Riches, I’m confronted by a realization of patterns of thinking in my life which have led to decision-making patterns and outcomes.  There is a vein of consistency in certain outcomes running through the decades of my life which creates some personal discomfort.  I am beginning to see a limp in my walk metaphorically speaking, and this limp appears to have been there for some time.  Jesus came to heal our “limps” but we have to recognize they’re present before we can seek out medical attention right?

A challenging discussion came up in the Wednesday night bible study led by our pastor. The topic of the study is “Eating with Sinners”. Before I go further, please let me say that each of us in this small group realize we are “sinners” saved by grace. I just want to clear up any potential misconception that we sit in some morally superior seat looking for opportunities to do some charity work by eating with inferior people. If not for the work of Jesus on the Cross, that’s the crowd I’m residing in. And if the truth be told, I kind of feel more comfortable hanging out in this crowd today…it’s more my neighborhood.

So this week, as we read from Luke 4, our pastor asked us to consider a modern-day example to help understand the context of what was being said in our reading. This quickly led to a challenge to pray over the next week about how we as a group could demonstrate a love that would stretch us out of our comfort zone within our community.

A suggestion was made about creating a place for convicted sex-offenders to safely come and worship in a church atmosphere. This population of people have very little (if any) opportunity to attend church because there are typically probation or parole terms and conditions that forbid them from being in places where children frequent…and for good reason! At work, our jaded hearts lead to jokes about “jailhouse conversions” which are really just more attempts to manipulate in order to lessen pending consequences…but there are those who are broken and repentant about the damage they’ve caused. Once released from confinement, they have nowhere to go to worship and begin the process of becoming a part of the Body of Christ.

Let me take a quick snapshot in this moment because our reflexes can communicate a lot of raw and unscripted information… The child who flinches when dad raises his hand for some random reason…this can be a “tell” about what’s going on behind closed doors. It’s not 100% accurate, but it certainly can mean something. How about you right now? How did you react to the suggestion/need of the convicted sex offender I just mentioned above? Was your heart filled with compassion for this group of people or do emotions tend to gravitate more in the other direction toward not caring about their spiritual needs or any other needs they may have for that matter? Needs such as finding a residence, employment, healthy community involvement, etc.

Full transparency here: as a probation officer, I’ve had several discussions with my superiors about transitioning to the Sex-Offender Unit. Each time I have expressed no interest at all. The most recent time this discussion came up, I was told to be prepared because the department had a short list of people they felt were in a place to take on this duty. I became angry because I had no desire to work with this population of people and felt it was management’s responsibility to be doing the work to prepare those employees who had this desire so they could step in when the need came. I just want to communicate that I’m not the poster-boy advocating for sex-offender rights/needs here.

This morning over my hazelnut coffee, I was thinking about those “profiles” of people we are unwilling to love.  I have my own “profile” and perhaps you are aware you have your own. It occurred to me as I talked with a good friend and brother in the Lord that we’ve in affect, drawn a line between us and them and declared we’re blessed to benefit from the saving work of Jesus on the Cross, but the people or group of people on the other side of the line do not get such a benefit.  We get salvation…but they can burn in Hell…we experience forgiveness, but none will be given to them…we can benefit from God’s grace and mercy daily…but they don’t get this.  As I consider the people on the other side of the line, as defined by my attitudes, I realize I’ve wandered into the neighborhood of some old wounds that have been treated like surface wounds…I’ve slapped a Band-Aid on these wounds and called it good.  All the while, an infection has festered below the surface which has, over time, altered perceptions, attitudes, and beliefs, leading to the shaping of my personal views.

As we talked in our bible study Wednesday night, there were some who appeared rather quiet and I wondered why. Did the discussion of extending grace to a convicted sex-offender rip at a scab? Did the person have a relative or a friend experience devastation at the hands of a perpetrator? Maybe they were ill and it took all their strength just to make it to the group that night so I don’t want to make too much of that…but I suspect it warrants some personal exploration in our own lives. What would the Lord desire to show us within our own heart regarding the people we have the most difficulty showing love towards?

Jesus came to meet me (and you) where we are at…and although there are times I try to convince Him this is a great neighborhood to live in, He never intended to leave me (or you) where He found us. “But Lord, the HOA is affordable and they have bike paths going through open-spaces, and the wildlife is amazing! There have to be at least 20 squirrels running around in the backyard trees!” Jesus came to bridge a gap of separation between us and God, and to show us that we are living far below the standard of living we were created to enjoy…but this will require us to let go of certain things that can’t be taken with us.

Time will tell if we are able to move toward establishing a place for sex-offenders to safely come and worship…and experience the restoration each of us desperately needed at some point in our own lives, but my prayer for you is that you will enjoy the freedom that has been offered to us…and when you experience it, please let me know what it’s like. I will need that encouragement as I work through my own stuff.

Thanks for taking the time to read this.  Let me know what your thoughts are as you consider your own walk.