BECOMING STRONGER THAN THE EXCUSES

As a person who’s spent years working with people in the throes of addiction, I am fully aware that the battle to become clean and sober is never over. The demons never really leave, they simply take up residence on the outskirts of town and await an opportune time to test our convictions… always looking for a moment when we lower our guard. We certainly can live in victory, but it will require developing a lifestyle where we are always aware of our triggers… always aware of the moment we are in.

For someone new to this blog, please notice I used the words “our” and “we“. Addictions can take many different forms, some illegal, and some so common in our culture that we fail to see they represent a prison cell of their own. The needle, the pipe, the bottle… the consequences of these addictions can be easy to spot. Addictions to sugar/overeating; negative thinking patterns; cellphones, sports betting, mindless scrolling on social media… if we’re not careful, these can become so familiar in our day-to-day lives we accept them as “normal”… and then do nothing to address them.

As I’ve said over and over before, I am a person working toward recovery, but my addiction is an unhealthy relationship with food… it’s both quantity of food as well as seeking out sugar for comfort when I’m stressed, depressed, celebrating something good… or simply bored. It’s the old rituals of craving nachos on a fall Sunday afternoon while watching football… It’s that mid-afternoon soda I somehow think I need on weekdays in the office, but never “need” on weekends.

Earlier this week, as I worked through my morning ritual of coffee and writing, the words in the title of this post came through my mind… becoming stronger than the excuses…

For some context, I’ve been focused for several months on portion control and working out. As much as I want to take the steps toward writing a book, my focus and my energy have been directed toward a routine that will lead to accomplishing the weight goal I’ve set, and then learning how to create and maintain a lifestyle that allows me to live with balance and remain in that desired weight-range. I’m a foodie… so the challenge for me is enjoying the experiences life has to offer while keeping those demons on the outskirts of town where they belong. There are other “mountains” I desire to climb, but right now, weight-loss and breaking the dysfunctional relationship with food is the mountain directly in front of me.

TRUST THE PROCESS

I have a process that is working for me. My “feelings” don’t always want to do the right thing, but it really doesn’t matter what I feel, what matters is what I’m willing to do. The image below is one I have in my office for my clients… it’s in my office for me as well…

Earlier this week when the words of the title to this post came through my mind, it was because I have seen a change taking place as I continue to trust the process. Right now, I’m winning. I don’t always have a lot of energy when I come home from work, but skipping the workout is not an option. When I eat dinner, I’m focused on eating slower and having one serving. The excuses to take shortcuts at home and in the office when donuts and candy show up are much weaker than they have been in the past. As they weaken, I strengthen.

TRANSPARENCY IS A MUST HERE…

I’m cautious as I share this. I want to be transparent. The person I’m writing to is the one who recognizes the change that needs to take place in their lives, and even if they’ve suffered setbacks due to bad decisions, they can get back up, they can find victory against their opponent.

Recently I purchased a book in the “find-your-best-life” genre, and I gave it an honest chance. I got to chapter 7 before putting the book away. I could not connect with the author… I did not feel they were talking to me.

So for you as the reader, please know this: I feel much stronger than my excuses right now, and I intend to continue getting stronger… but I am fully aware that relapse can happen. I will do no celebrating because this fight is no where near being over for me. I will enjoy the daily victories; I will take satisfaction in the progress I am making; but as every person in recover knows, we take one day at a time. Setbacks are bound to happen, but how we respond to those setbacks is the key to long-term victory. I don’t win every day, but I’m winning more than I used to, and the more I win, the more it starts to become the new norm for me.

EXCUSES ARE ALWAYS RIGHT THERE

Eliminating excuses is not always something we control. How we respond to excuses is something we absolutely do control. The thought of taking a night off from a workout, to eat a donut that show up at the office, to wrestle with justifying a purchase when our goals are financial… excuses will always be there. What I’m finding in my own personal battles is that the more I resist the power of the excuse, the weaker the excuse becomes and the stronger I begin to feel. The more I win, the stronger the momentum for the next fight.

For those of you struggling in your own fight for freedom, if you will consistently resist the excuses that have been your kryptonite in the past, my experience is leading me to believe there will come a day when you will become stronger than those excuses.

See you on the mountain as we continue to climb.